The other night my husband and I were having a conversation about things we would like to do. He turned to me and asked, very simply, “What are your goals?” Previously this is a question that I would be asking – to him and myself. As he asked me this seemingly simple question, I stood baffled and perplexed. What are my goals?
I don’t recall there ever being a single time in my life where I didn’t know the well rehearsed and thought out answers to this question.
In high school my goals were to graduate with good grades, go on to college, get a job teaching, marry the man of my dreams and have wonderful little babies…that lasted me for quite a while. It took me about ten years to do all of that! Now, here I sit, graduated, five years of teaching under my belt, three and a half years of a successful marriage and two beautiful baby boys. Now what?
This is such a strange shift for me. When Nathan and I were first married, it was my goal to go to graduate school and obtain my MSW to hopefully do something along the lines of family counseling. However, after much consideration, I decided that it was the Lord’s will for me to tend to my own family, before sacrificing time away from them to help to improve other families. So, I decided right then and there that I wanted to be a full-time mom and wife – here for my family.
To tell you the truth, currently, as of February 11, 2011, I’m unaware of any “goals.” I’m sort of just getting through each day accomplishing the things that need to be accomplished for that day….enjoying time with my children and husband, laundry, cooking, cleaning etc. That’s not a goal! That’s my life…a life I chose and am thrilled with.
Goals? Goals? Goals??? Perhaps I need to reconsider my definition of a goal.
Tending to two 8 ½ month old babies, a husband , two dogs and a house doesn’t exactly leave me much time for myself. (I’m not complaining – just stating a fact.) So it seems that my goals in this short stage of my life are centered on the family and later, I will make more specific goals for myself. I’m not going to do that whole “Who Am I?” thing because I am a wife and mother. I understand that I am also a woman, but I am a wife and mother first – as the Lord called me to be.
So….my goals? Well…. My number one goal is to be a wife and mother to be proud of….a wife and mother that the Lord expects me to be…
To show my husband love and respect, to show my children love and teach them to be respectful, disciplined, thoughtful, caring, loving, faithful, educated and God serving; to keep a well maintained house that is full of love, laughter and happiness; to be thankful for each day that I have; make economic and budget friendly decisions where possible; preserve memories for my children and figure out what my goals will be in the next short stage of my life.
I understand that in my new position (wife, mommy, me) goals will come in different forms and will often serve different parts of who I am. Sometimes I will have “Mommy Goals,” sometimes “Wife Goals,” and occasionally “Me Goals.”
I understand that goals are important, but I’ve lived that way before, always looking to my next goal, my next accomplishment. But now, I want to live with to enjoy each day, not taking a single moment for granted. I will still have goals, but they will not such an intense focus in my life.
My ultimate goal – one that will go on and on - is to have a God honoring life- long marriage and to raise our children to serve the Lord…..
I guess I’ll work out the rest as I go.
