Bittersweet

I've recently realized that sometimes when I am the happiest, the absence of my Daddy is most real.  Does that sound crazy?  When the boys do something funny or reach a milestone, I want so badly to share that with him.  I can just imagine him standing here next to us thinking everything they do is AMAZING! As a mother, it saddens me so that my boys don't have their Grandpa Frank...As a daughter, I wish I could share these special moments with him.  I miss him everyday. 

HOWEVER

I have felt the precense of the LORD through every moment since my dad's death.  For I know there is no way I would've even begun to come out on the other end had it not been for HIM.  Some might say, what horrible timing to lose your Daddy...To that I say..."It was in God's time! For the timing could not have been better.  I had just spent the best week of my life with my Daddy and he had been here to be a part of something so wonderful (the birth of Asher & Nolan).  The Lord gave me our sons at the most perfect time. 

As I have shared in previous posts, I was always somebody who was "wishing my life away" and unable to enjoy the present.  Because of the Lord's timing, I was able to learn the valuable lesson of enjoying every precious second with my loved ones just in time.  Imagine if had turned out differently and I remaind that same somebody who not only "wished MY life away," but consequently wished away the life my children.  But now, because of God's perfect timing I am enjoying every single second I am able to spend with my children, my husband and other loved ones. 

I am truly thankful for HIS perfect timing of this lesson. 

Thank You Sara

When I started this blog, it was my intention to remind myself to enjoy every moment that the Lord has given me; to use the experiences in my own life to help others remember to enjoy their own and to occassionally entertain you with a few funny stories or videos :D 

It is so wonderful to know that there are people otu there that actually take the time to read my thoughts, experiences and feelings..Usually it's  Grandma, Auntie Aubrey, Nana and occassionally Cousin Brady...But sometimes we get other readers and when we do...My oh my!

Tonight, after reading a friends blog (who apparently started blogging because of me) I realized what a blessing it was to hear.  It was my hope that I would spark emotion in others through my own experiences and she has shared with me that I have succeeded in such.  I wish her many happy blogging days and hope that it brings her as much satisfaction as it has brought to me!

It will never cease to be amazed with how quickly babies change.  Daily, I see two brand new little people right before my very eyes.  I don't have long to write, but I wanted to give you an update on what life is like for us now that Asher and Nolan are nearing 8 months old (just a week away...sniff...sniff)

Asher and Nolan are both very capable of crawling on their hands and knees, however, more often than not, they choose to use the "army crawl" technique as they find it much more efficent.  I love to watch them "rev up their engines" as they get on all fours and rock back and forth. It is very cute. 

They are eating three (very small) meals a day now.  Their diet consists homemade baby food (unless we're really in a hurry).  They eat sweet potatoes, apples, bananas, avocado, carrots, green beans, peas, pears, turkey, chicken, potatoes, squash, pumpkin and yogurt. 

Nolan has recently figured out how to use the spoon and usually insists that he feed himself! Noth of the boys are eating some finger foods now such as small pieces of banana, carrots and apple.  They are capable of pikcing up the food and putting it in their mouths, but I tend to cut it so tiny that it's nearly impossible for them to get a good grip on it.  :)

They are also taking BIG BOY BATHS.  No more baby tub...we just fill up the tub and sit them right in it.  Asher is still a little unsure of it, but doesn't seem to mind it too much.  Nolan flops around like a fish.  The first time we sat him down in the tub he decided he was going to get on his belly and "swim" around. 

They are really able to move around now.  They can both go from  a crawling to sitting position as well as a sitting to crawling position.  That means a new found freedom for them. They are also enjoy pulling things out of their toy basket or just tipping it over for fun...Pulling things off of the shelves is a favorite past time as well :)  Nolan has been pulling himself up on things, but not often.  We have installed a new gate to keep them out of the kitchen...otherwise I wouldn't have to feed them any dinner because they would just eat the dog food. 

Tye are also down to two naps a day...usually a total of two hours of sleep per day...if we're lucky. 

Still up for one early morning feeding per night.  Sleeping from about 7:30 to 4:00 then till 7:00. 

Oh yeah, they get to sit in the shopping cart and high chairs now!  They think they are big big stuff! 

I can't believe all that they can do.  That's all for now...Sorry this was so boring and factual...but that's all I've got time for at the moment.  Hope to be a bit more entertaining or at least insightful next time.  Take care! 

Just One of Those Days...

Have you ever had one of those days when the sun seemed to shine just the right way, the air circulated at just the right temperature and everything made you smile throughout?!  I have! 

I really really hate to see my baby boys growing up, but...I have to admit that each day they seem more and more amazing to me than the day before.  Each day I enjoy them a little more (as if that were even possible).  Each day we find new reasons to laugh and smile at one another and it brings me so much happiness.  To be able to sit in the evening and share dinnertime with my husband and my children is such a blessing.  To be able to play, laugh and share the time in the evening is an even greater blessing. 

Tonight was one of those night's when Nathan got a wild hiar to do something silly and here were the results...smiling happy faces...

Last weekend Nathan also got some sort of inspiration to be silly....Take a look

Remember When

Look at these two little boys!  They are about seven and a half months now and changing faster than ever.  We went to my mom's house for Christmas (for about a week or so) and by the time we returned I had two little babies that quickly transformed into two not so "little" babies. 

I found myself reflecting on the past seven and a half months and getting very emotional about the time that has passed.  I don't know that I will ever quite understand why babies grow so quickly....reaching adulthood in eighteen years I can understand, but all of the changes that take place in a child's first year are simply amazing!

It's funny how quickly we forget all of the things they did when they were "babies" just a few months ago.  The reason behind this (other than lack of sleep) - they change so fast that what they used to do could be what they did just last week. 

So, as my post title states...Remember When....

Come with me on a journey of remembering

Remember when I used to hold the boys and they would just drift off to sleep with ease while in my arms' embrace. (They are much too busy for this now).

Remember when they  would be laying quietly on their backs and then all of a sudden have what I like to call "an arm spasm" (Asher did this quite a bit more and then he would slowly lower his hands and arms back down the the sides of his body.  I always thought it was the cutest thing ever!)

Remember when I was always looking at was a little closed eye baby and longed for the day that that baby would open his eyes to meet mine.

Remember when they would cry so sweetly and quietly and it would break my heart into a million pieces.

Remember when they used to think the ceiling was the most fascinating thing in their environment (it's a good thing, since they constantly had it as their scenery).

Remember when their poop didn't even stink (I really miss that part!).

Remember their teeny tiny preemie clothes (that I can't bare to part with...they're just too little).

Remember how all I did all day long was nurse babies (I used to secretly wish that they would "hurry up" and finish - now with their five minute nursing sessions I wish they would slow down a little so I can actually sit down for a minute enjoy the still quiet),

Remember how I could fit both of them into any small space,

Remember the way their little scaly skin was shedding (or something...I never did quite understand that one).

Remember how the first two weeks of their lives all I could smell was A & D ointment (if you have little boys, you understand this one!)

Remember how I could put them lay them down in one spot, leave the room and there they'd be when I returned.

Asher LOVES to crawl underneath his crib! We often find him there!

This is just a small glimpse into the things that come and go so quickly.  It all seems like ages ago.  When we brought Asher & Nolan home they were just under six pounds and so little and delicate and knew nothing more than the fact that they wanted to be fed and changed and loved...now I have two little boys who are about seventeen pounds that crawl all over the place, sit up and look around at the world that surrounds them, smile back at me when I smile at them, touch everything, laugh at one another, eat food off of a spoon, drink water out of a sippy cup, choose books and toys of their liking on purpose, dump over the toys basket (and anything else that can be dumped over), play with each other and who warm my heart perfectly. 

In just a few months, I'm sure I will be reflecting about this time saying once again, "remember when" because I will have two little boys who will be nearing a year old and will have grown so much from now until then. 

I know I've said it before, but I will continue to say it...I really do cherish every moment I am with them.  I am truly thankful that I have a husband who desires me to be home with our children and works hard to make that happen.  I can't imagine my life any other way.  I've never been happier!