Bittersweet

I've recently realized that sometimes when I am the happiest, the absence of my Daddy is most real.  Does that sound crazy?  When the boys do something funny or reach a milestone, I want so badly to share that with him.  I can just imagine him standing here next to us thinking everything they do is AMAZING! As a mother, it saddens me so that my boys don't have their Grandpa Frank...As a daughter, I wish I could share these special moments with him.  I miss him everyday. 

HOWEVER

I have felt the precense of the LORD through every moment since my dad's death.  For I know there is no way I would've even begun to come out on the other end had it not been for HIM.  Some might say, what horrible timing to lose your Daddy...To that I say..."It was in God's time! For the timing could not have been better.  I had just spent the best week of my life with my Daddy and he had been here to be a part of something so wonderful (the birth of Asher & Nolan).  The Lord gave me our sons at the most perfect time. 

As I have shared in previous posts, I was always somebody who was "wishing my life away" and unable to enjoy the present.  Because of the Lord's timing, I was able to learn the valuable lesson of enjoying every precious second with my loved ones just in time.  Imagine if had turned out differently and I remaind that same somebody who not only "wished MY life away," but consequently wished away the life my children.  But now, because of God's perfect timing I am enjoying every single second I am able to spend with my children, my husband and other loved ones. 

I am truly thankful for HIS perfect timing of this lesson.