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No.  A simple two letter word that the Mommy of every toddler utters more than desirable.  I have a new meaning of the word NO...N(essecary) O(pportunities). 

My boys are a few days shy of 16 months old, which is very hard for me to believe, as usual.  We have once again entered into a new stage.  I catch myself saying no over and over and over again.  Let's be clear about one thing, it's not because my kids are "bad" because they are not.  They are very obeident children. Actually, the overuse of the word no is not their fault at all, it's mine.  I have had a difficult time deciding their boundries.  I firmly believe in consistency with child rearing, but I am embarassed to say that I have not been as consistent as I would like to be.  It seems like I am torn in two directions with their every move.  What is acceptable behavior and what is not?  What are they allowed to touch, climb, tap, throw, eat and what are they not?  So many of these things are simply a part of development.  If they were NOT trying to do all of these things then I would be worried that they were delayed in some way.  They have just let me know they are quite healthy and right on target for development.  They are curious, as all children should be.  I am inspired by their inquisitive little minds.  My job is to decide what is acceptable and to teach them which behaviors are appropriate and which are not. 

I'm challenging myself to change my perspective...afterall this is a blog about the perspective of a Mommy!  As my wise husband told me the other day, "They're not bad, they're just curious and busy..."  He's right.  We adults let it all cloud our head and may at times become frutrated when there are toys everywhere, a toddler just slipped and bumped his head and the other one is headed to his favorite snack dish (aka - THE DOG FOOD!)  In that moment, it can seem like a lot, but if I stop and take a step back, it's pretty funny and I should feel lucky to be a part of this blessed chaos everyday.  Sometimes I don't think I give myself enough credit though...there are TWO 16 MONTH OLDS IN THIS HOUSE!  You don't get to tell me how peaceful it is at your house if you only have one or if yours have been grown for 5 years or more :D  Two perfectly healthy 16 month boys are busy.  Sometimes us fuddy duddy adults mistake busy for 'bad.'  Busy does NOT equate to BAD, so don't confuse the two....like I sometimes do....

I'm on a journey to read several child rearing books.  I've never done it before, but I do have some instincts that I trust, but I also feel as though this is the most important job I've (n)ever done!  What qualifications do we have to have to be a 'good mom'?  There's no training or school that certifies one as a "good mother." My job is to TEACH...not just discipline all day long.  I need to teach our children correct behaviors.  So, I'm changing my language and reverting to something I was very familar with as a public school teacher.  I'm going to use positive statements as often as possible.  For example, When Nolan is standing on the couch, I'll replace "no" with "sit down"  I'd like to limit the use of the word no and instead remind myself that it is a necessary opportunity for me to TEACH our children appropriate and acceptable behaviors. 

Wish me luck....